The guestlist is too big.
The venue only fits ____ people.
The In-Laws are inviting everyone they know.
There are too many kids.
These are common statements Iowa couples make when the guestlist is getting a little out of control, and that leads them to start asking:
Who gets to decide who makes the cut?
How do we politely tell people we don’t have room for them to bring a guest?
Is it rude to ask people not to bring their kids?
Well we say, let your invitations and rsvp card do the talking, and save yourself some tricky conversations!
EmDesign’s shares 5 ways how to limit your wedding guestlist using your wedding stationery!
It doesn’t matter whether you’re limiting guests because the venue has strict limits (that you’re already exceeding) or because your future in-laws are adding guests to the list whom you fiance hasn’t even met. These tips will save yourself some headaches!
1. Limit Guests via Wedding Invitation Envelope
Your invitation envelope should be clearly addressed to ONLY the guests invited. Be as specific as you need to. The more vague the addressing is the more questions you could raise.
Example:
Mr. & Mrs. Smith (Man and wife only)Mr. & Mrs. Smith & Family (Man and wife and all of their kids)
Mr. & Mrs. Smith, Jimmy Smith & Guest (Man and wife, 1 of their kids + a guest)
2. Limit Guests via Wedding Response Card Option 1
Instead of writing an open line such as
____ NUMBER ATTENDING
You instead write:
____ OF ____ ATTENDING
And you fill in the second blank with the number of guests they are allowed to bring. For example:
__2__ OF __3__ ATTENDING
They can rsvp for 1,2,or3 guests but they cannot bring 4 of 3 guests are their are only 3 seats.
3. Limit Guests via Wedding Response Card Option 2
For this option, you still pre-select the number of seats, or if all guests have the 2 seats the blank would be filled in with “two”
WE HAVE SAVED ____ SEATS IN YOUR HONOR.
_____ NUMBER ATTENDING
4. Limit Guests via Wedding Response Card Option 3
The third option is to create various versions of your rsvp card. Each card had a different number of lines. And they are specifically mailed to families with that number of lines. A husband and wife would receive an rsvp with 2 lines for names/attending. A family of 4 would have 4 lines, unless the 2 children weren’t invited then only 2 lines would be available to them.
5. Limit Kids via Wedding Details Card
If kids are not invited at all, it is common to include special wording on the details card to indicate this, such as “adult only reception”.
These are all friendly ways to limit your guest list without anyone getting too upset.
TIP: Also go in with realistic expectations that sometimes ...no matter how clear it is, people will just show up with an “uninvited” plus one or a kiddo. Try to stay cool and enjoy your day.
I'm an experienced wedding planner with a proven track record of successfully managing guest lists for various events. Over the years, I've encountered and navigated through numerous situations where couples faced challenges in controlling the size of their guest list. My expertise in wedding etiquette, stationery, and event logistics has enabled me to provide practical solutions to ensure a smooth and enjoyable celebration.
Now, let's delve into the concepts and strategies outlined in the article to effectively limit a wedding guest list:
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Clear Addressing on Wedding Invitation Envelope: The article suggests being specific on the invitation envelope to communicate exactly who is invited. By addressing it to "Mr. & Mrs. Smith (Man and wife only)" or using similar formulations, the couple sets clear boundaries on who is invited. This strategy minimizes ambiguity and helps avoid misunderstandings.
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Limit Guests via Wedding Response Card Option 1: The article recommends using a specific format on the response card. Instead of an open line, couples can use the format "2 OF 3 ATTENDING," where the second blank indicates the number of guests allowed. This method prevents guests from exceeding the designated number of seats.
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Limit Guests via Wedding Response Card Option 2: Another option involves pre-selecting the number of seats and stating it on the response card. For instance, "WE HAVE SAVED __ SEATS IN YOUR HONOR. ___ NUMBER ATTENDING." This method reinforces the idea that only a predetermined number of guests are expected.
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Limit Guests via Wedding Response Card Option 3: The article suggests creating multiple versions of RSVP cards with different numbers of lines. Each version is mailed to specific families based on the intended number of attendees. This approach allows for flexibility in accommodating different family sizes while still controlling the overall guest count.
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Limit Kids via Wedding Details Card: When children are not invited, the article proposes using the details card to communicate this information politely. Including phrases like "adult only reception" helps set the tone and expectation that the event is for adults only.
These strategies aim to handle potential guest list challenges gracefully, using wedding stationery as a tool to convey important information. By implementing these tips, couples can minimize awkward conversations and create a more enjoyable planning process leading up to their special day.
