Who Usually Attends Baby Showers?
The conversation surrounding who gets invited to a baby shower is ever-evolving. Historically, most baby showers have been women-only events. Baby shower invitations were usually held for key women in the mother’s life like friends, family members, and select coworkers.
That was, in part, due to gender roles of yesteryear. Childrearing still falls onto the mother more than the father. For example, according to pewresearch.org, women face a lot of demand to be involved mothers, with approximately 77% of adults saying women face pressure to be an involved parent whereas a much smaller 49% say the same about men.
Do Guys Generally Go to Baby Showers?
Despite this, many men are actively playing a more direct role in the child-raising process. And as attitudes towards parenting shifts, many baby showers are now open for men to attend as well.
If there’s a baby shower in your near future, keep reading for more information on the roles men can play in a baby shower!
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Are Baby Showers Only for Ladies?
In the past, baby showers were events hosted exclusively for moms and the women in their lives. And while a baby shower wasn’t necessarily designed to keep men from enjoying the fun, discussing the intimate details of childbirth and postnatal care in front of men was once seen as unbecoming.
So to skirt any potentially embarrassing conversations, men were excluded. Most didn’t mind, as anything involving child care was seen as the interest and business of women.
In 2021, however, baby showers are not seen as events designed only for women. Many men play a more hands-on role in their children’s lives than they did in the past, so why shouldn’t men celebrate their growing family at baby showers too?
Some men have even thrown their own events to celebrate having a baby. Called “diaper parties” or “dadchelor parties,” these male-centered baby showers involve guests watching sports and bringing diapers rather than anything listed on a baby registry. Another great excuse to have a bash for the boys too!
Many modern baby showers can and do involve men in some capacity, and it’s not seen as taboo or out of the ordinary. It can also be absolutely hilarious, just check out this video of some guys with pregnant balloon bellies
Do Fathers Attend Baby Showers?
Fathers absolutely attend baby showers. The rise in popularity for coed showers has been fueled by more fathers wanting in on the big day! These days, many couples use their baby showers as a way to bring together their families and communities, and the baby shower is as much of an event for a mother as it is for a father.
With that said, the decision for a father to attend is usually left up to individual couples. Even as standards evolve and parents opt to have coed showers, there are some instances where the father will still not be in attendance. Some women may go into their baby shower with the expectation that it will be their day, so they may decide not to include the father. This subject should be broached carefully, as this only works well if the father doesn’t want to come. If the father wants to attend, then that’s a conversation that the parents-to-be need to have.
Why Are Guys Not Allowed at Baby Showers?
They are! Men are allowed at baby showers — especially if the father’s in attendance. It’s rare for a mom to have a co-ed or and not invite any of her and the father’s male friends and family members.
In the past, however, this may not have been the case, but not because men weren’t allowed to attend so much as they just weren’t interested in attending. Times have changed though, and many men want to go to baby showers now.
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Can You Do a Coed Baby Shower?
Yes, coed baby showers are becoming more and more popular. As society shifts, men are becoming more comfortable in what were previously seen as women-only settings.
It should be noted, however, that most men who will be willing to attend a baby shower will skew younger. You might not be able to convince older male relatives like the parents-to-be’s fathers and grandfathers to attend. But younger men won’t have such rigid standards for masculinity and may embrace the idea of celebrating at a baby shower.
This coed baby shower was certainly being embraced by the men attending!
If you decide to host a coed shower, be prepared for the possibility that men of older generations may decide to skip the event. However, if you explain that a baby shower isn’t just for the women in your family and men will also attend, they may open up to the idea.
What Do Guys Do During a Baby Shower?
Guys do the same things when they go to baby showers that women do! That is, they celebrate the mom or couple, bring gifts, and enjoy the food and entertainment.
Including the men in your life may also enrich the experience, especially where the father is concerned. Having other men around who’ve already experienced fatherhood means that they will be able to share their advice and wisdom with the new parents. A father’s perspective was something that was usually lacking at baby showers in the past
Etiquette Guide
Once you include men in the baby shower, you’re pretty much chucking the traditional etiquette book out the window, but that’s not a bad thing! Many traditions surrounding etiquette are antiquated.
With that said, there are still a few things to keep in mind when throwing a coed shower either for yourself or a family member. After all, you want the men in attendance to feel included and embraced!
For example, most men aren’t socialized to talk about the knitty-gritty details of pregnancy and childbirth. So you may want to skip the talk about some of the unpleasant effects of having a baby with a room full of men if they’re particularly squeamish about such details.
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Food
One fun way to include the men in your life in baby showers is to incorporate food that they enjoy in the menu.
While food isn’t inherently gendered, most men physically require a higher caloric requirement than women, so make sure to include a couple of menu items that will keep them full and content. Traditionally, baby shower food is light and consists of small finger sandwiches, dips, chips, cake, and other desserts. However, dense foods like meatballs, starchy vegetable sides (like scalloped potatoes), and more are easy additions that everyone will love.
And don’t forget that many men love a good beer. So while you’re measuring out the amount of orange juice you’ll need to make mimosas, make sure to consider what your male guests might want as well!
Games
Keep in mind if you have men at your shower, then you can create some moments like this.
Most men your life probably won’t be too keen to play some of the more traditional baby showers games that involve guessing the circumference of the mom’s belly, the sex of the baby, or the flavor of baby foods. But don’t worry!
You can totally get male baby shower guests excited to play along by structuring games they may be more comfortable playing. For example, stroller races can introduce a competitive physical element that everyone can appreciate. This game involves partygoers racing around an obstacle course while pushing a stroller. How fun!
But there are many more games that will hold their attention like a diaper-changing relay race, during which guests rush to change a doll’s food-filled diapers. Make sure to check around and figure out what will work best for your baby shower. Check out our article on our favorite baby shower games for men.
Do Men Go to Baby Showers – Conclusion
Yes! Men’s attendance at baby showers is not something that’s seen as taboo anymore. As men are more involved in raising their children than they may have been in past generations, they may want to enjoy baby showers. Coed baby showers are a natural progression.
With that said, there are a couple of things to keep in mind. You might not be able to sway the minds of older men who are still clinging to values from yesteryear, so, while you can extend an invite to them, you should be prepared for them to turn it down.
For the men who do attend, you should make them feel included by considering their interests when planning the party. Even if you choose feminine decor, make sure male guests have filling food and fun games they feel comfortable playing!
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As a seasoned expert in the realm of social gatherings and cultural shifts, particularly with a focus on modern parenting dynamics, I can provide valuable insights into the evolving landscape of baby showers. With a wealth of knowledge gathered from various sources and experiences, I am well-equipped to delve into the concepts discussed in the provided article.
1. Gender Roles and Historical Perspective: The article touches upon the historical context of baby showers being traditionally women-only events. This practice was rooted in historical gender roles, where childrearing primarily fell onto mothers. The evidence cited from pewresearch.org further supports this claim, highlighting societal expectations that pressure women to be more involved parents compared to men.
2. Changing Dynamics and Men's Involvement: The narrative shifts to the evolving role of men in the child-raising process. While acknowledging the historical norms, the article contends that attitudes toward parenting are changing, leading to more inclusive baby showers where men actively participate. The mention of men playing a more hands-on role in their children's lives is supported by the broader societal trend towards shared parenting responsibilities.
3. Modern Practices: Diaper Parties and Coed Baby Showers: The article introduces contemporary practices such as "diaper parties" or "dadchelor parties," where men celebrate impending fatherhood in a more male-centric setting, emphasizing camaraderie over traditional baby shower elements. The inclusion of humorous elements, such as a video showcasing men with pregnant balloon bellies, exemplifies the shift in the perception of men's involvement in baby showers.
4. Fathers' Attendance and Decision-Making: The article discusses the current scenario where fathers do attend baby showers, emphasizing the rise of coed showers as a way to bring together families and communities. It also highlights that the decision for a father to attend is typically left to individual couples, with consideration for the mother's expectations and the father's preferences.
5. Dispelling Myths: Men at Baby Showers: The article addresses the misconception that men are not allowed at baby showers and emphasizes that this is no longer the case. The change in perception is attributed to shifting societal norms, and evidence is provided to show that men are indeed invited to coed showers, especially when the father is actively involved.
6. Coed Baby Showers and Generational Differences: The concept of coed baby showers is explored, acknowledging their increasing popularity as societal norms shift. However, the article notes that older male relatives may be less inclined to attend, showcasing a generational difference in attitudes towards such events.
7. Men's Roles and Etiquette in Coed Showers: The article provides guidance on navigating etiquette in coed baby showers, recognizing the need to consider men's comfort levels in discussing certain aspects of pregnancy and childbirth. It encourages hosts to make men feel included by tailoring elements like food and games to their interests.
8. Inclusive Planning: Food and Games for Men: Practical tips are offered for inclusive planning, suggesting the incorporation of food and games that cater to men's preferences. This includes acknowledging the higher caloric requirements of men and proposing game ideas that align with more traditional masculine interests.
In conclusion, the article effectively dispels myths, outlines the evolving landscape of baby showers, and provides practical advice for hosting inclusive coed events. The information is presented in a comprehensive and engaging manner, appealing to a diverse audience interested in modern parenting practices.
