What To Do When A Parent Dies: A Financial Checklist | Capital One (2024)

November 9, 2018 |6 min read

    Whether it’s expected or sudden, the death of a parent is a stressful time for most. While it’s hard to prepare yourself emotionally, there are steps you can take to manage the practical issues a bit more easily. Finances, for one, can feel like a maze of paperwork, digital records, passwords and perhaps even shoeboxes.

    As you’re preparing for the death of a parent, a checklist of financial questions and actions may help you stay organized. While each family’s way of coping will be different, there are some steps you can take when a parent dies that may help you through this difficult process.

    What to do right away

    At first, it may be hard to think about money at all, but there will be choices to make in the days following your parent’s passing. It may help to take care of pressing concerns as early as you’re able, then take a little time before moving on to the next set of tasks.

    • Preparing for funeral costs: The median cost of a funeral in 2017 was just under $9,000,1 a major expense for many people. Costs do vary, however, depending on whether burial or cremation is chosen. It may be comforting to know that the Federal Trade Commission has a say in how funeral homes operate, and offers its own checklist to help you through this decision-making process.

    • Gathering official records: Getting access to your parent’s financial accounts may require proof of death, so this should be done as soon as you can. Most counties have an office of vital statistics that houses birth, marriage and death certificates, and some allow you to request those online. Others may ask that you call call or visit. If your parent passes away in another country, the United States Department of State will be able to assist you.

    • Contacting Social Security: If your parent was receiving Social Security benefits, reaching out to the Social Security Administration will ensure that payments stop, and keep you from having to repay the government.2 This may seem like something that can wait, but the government says it should be done as soon as possible. The funeral home may do this for you, but if not call 1-800-772-1213. If your parent’s spouse plans to apply for survivors benefits, or if you have other questions, visit SSA.gov.

    What to do in the coming weeks

    While you’re still in mourning, there will be certain things that need some attention in the weeks and months following the funeral, which can be very difficult. But this would be the time to review your parent’s will, settle their debts and make decisions about any property they own, perhaps even your family home.

    • Contact insurance companies and providers: If your parent received Medicare, the Social Security Administration should cancel coverage. But if they had supplemental Medicare coverage or private health insurance, you’ll need to contact the plan by calling the phone number on their ID card or statement.

      You should also notify life insurance companies to start the process of filing any available claims. And be sure to cancel any other insurance policies your parent may have carried, like auto insurance.

    • Secure the will: Naturally, a checklist for the death of a parent involves finding their will.

      If you’re not sure there is one, ask friends, siblings or your parent’s lawyer whether there is a will and where to find it. You could also ask your parent’s bank, in case the will is in a safe deposit box there. (Each state’s laws determine who can access the safe deposit box of a deceased account holder.)

      The best path to settling your parent’s will, especially if there’s an inheritance, may be hiring a probate attorney familiar with state and local laws. Ask trusted friends for a recommendation or contact the local legal bar.

    • Make a list of bills: As you go through your parent’s home, be sure to gather documents from every possible expense that may need to be paid or canceled, including utility bills and credit cards. If there are debts, alert the executor of the will. This is the person who was chosen to handle all final affairs, including paying ongoing charges and canceling things like subscriptions and memberships.

    • Contact banks and investment accounts: If your parent owned investments or other financial assets, they may have named “beneficiaries.” These are the people your parent left these assets to. With proof of death, you may be able to transfer the accounts to the beneficiary. Certain bank accounts are also set up as “Payable on Death” or POD, which means the assets transfer directly to the beneficiary outside of the probate process.

    • Settle debts: One hard aspect of managing a parent’s money is paying off debts. If your mom or dad had a loan with a spouse, the spouse may be responsible for the debt. Otherwise, the executor of the will is probably the person who will handle this.3

      If there is no will, the court will appoint an executor. Whatever the case, paying off debts is important for avoiding interest charges. This includes car loans, home loans, credit cards and medical debts.

    • Manage the home: If your parent lived alone, it can be difficult to decide what to do with their home. You could start by making a list of ongoing costs you’ll need to continue paying, including utilities, upkeep and taxes. (For reference, consider your own household costs.) It’s important that these bills get paid while you’re deciding whether to move into the home, rent it or even sell it. In the meantime, the mortgage company or landlord can show you how to continue making payments.

    • Pay your parent’s taxes: If your parent didn’t have an accountant and you don’t feel comfortable filing taxes yourself, ask friends and relatives for help finding a reputable accountant to file on your parent’s behalf. If possible, try to get ahead of taxes before they're due to avoid unnecessary headaches down the line. An accountant is especially important if your parent’s estate is in the tens of millions of dollars, in which case they may owe federal and state estate tax.

    • Pay your taxes: Even though there’s no federal inheritance tax, and only a handful of states with an inheritance tax, you should check with your local tax office to make sure you don’t owe anything. If you sell your parent’s home, the proceeds probably won’t be taxable because the “purchase price” will be considered the fair market value at the time of the owner’s death.4 Still, it may be worth consulting the IRS, your state tax authority or an accountant.

    In a time of grief and challenging emotions, having a simple financial checklist after a parent dies, along with the help of experts, may relieve some stress and worry just when you need it most.

    What To Do When A Parent Dies: A Financial Checklist | Capital One (2024)

    FAQs

    How to handle finances after death of parent? ›

    In this article:
    1. Get help from estate planning professionals.
    2. Locate and gather records.
    3. Update financial accounts.
    4. Review the status of real estate and other property.
    5. Questions to discuss with your Ameriprise financial advisor.

    How do I prepare for the death of my parent financially? ›

    Here are steps to help you prepare financially and legally for a parent's death:
    1. Look for or Create Their End-Of-Life Plan. ...
    2. Find Your Parent's Last Will and Testament. ...
    3. Locate Your Parent's Living Trust. ...
    4. Get a Durable Power of Attorney for Finances. ...
    5. Gather Other Important Documents. ...
    6. Make an Inventory of Assets.

    Who makes financial decisions after death? ›

    KEY TERM: Personal representative. A personal representative is an estate executor or administrator, or someone who has legal authority to pay debts from the estate. A personal representative's job is to make payments to survivors and handle the debts of someone who has died.

    What happens to money in bank when parent dies? ›

    If someone dies without a will, the bank account still passes to the named beneficiary for the account. If someone dies without a will and without naming a beneficiary, it gets more complicated. In general, the executor of the estate handles any assets the deceased owned, including money in bank accounts.

    Do I take on my mom's debt when she died? ›

    If there's no money in their estate, the debts will usually go unpaid. For survivors of deceased loved ones, including spouses, you're not responsible for their debts unless you shared legal responsibility for repaying as a co-signer, a joint account holder, or if you fall within another exception.

    What not to do when a parent dies? ›

    What NOT to Do After a Parent Dies
    1. Don't Sell Their Assets. ...
    2. Don't Wait to Alert the Social Security Administration. ...
    3. Don't Clean Out Their Home or Apartment Too Soon. ...
    4. Don't Promise or Give Away Any Assets to Loved Ones. ...
    5. Don't Drive Their Vehicles. ...
    6. Don't Allow Other People to Stay on Their Property.
    Dec 15, 2022

    What are the first steps after a parent dies? ›

    Immediate Steps to Take When a Loved One Dies
    • Getting a legal pronouncement of death. ...
    • Arranging for the body to be transported. ...
    • Making arrangements for the care of dependents and pets.
    • Contacting others including:
    • Making final arrangements. ...
    • Getting copies of the death certificate.

    What is the hardest age to lose a parent? ›

    While it's difficult to pinpoint a “worst” age to lose a parent, as individual experiences with grief vary widely, certain life stages can intensify the challenges associated with this loss. Adolescence to young adulthood (roughly ages 12-25) is often cited as a particularly vulnerable period.

    When a parent dies where does their debt go? ›

    Most debts will be paid by your estate, out of your assets, before the remainder is distributed to your heirs. If the estate's assets do not cover all the debt, much of it will be forgiven. Some types won't, however, and rules differ from state to state.

    What to say to a dying parent? ›

    Let them know you're there.

    No one should feel alone, as these feelings can create unhealthy stress and excess sadness. It's important to let your loved one know that you're there for them — reassurance is key. Some good phrases to use are “You are not alone in this,” and “I'm here with you and for you.”

    Can you prepare yourself for the death of a parent? ›

    Some ways to emotionally prepare for the death of a parent include: Take the opportunity to tell them what you need them to know. Say “I love you” or “I'm sorry” or “I forgive you” while you have the chance. Honor your parent while they're still alive.

    Can I withdraw money from a deceased person's bank account? ›

    If you're the joint owner of the deceased person's bank account, you should be able to withdraw money right away. Otherwise, you typically must supply documents showing that you legally have access to the account. Documents a bank might request include: Government-issued ID, such as your driver's license or passport.

    What debts are forgiven at death? ›

    Upon your death, unsecured debts such as credit card debt, personal loans and medical debt are typically discharged or covered by the estate. They don't pass to surviving family members. Federal student loans and most Parent PLUS loans are also discharged upon the borrower's death.

    Are bank accounts frozen when someone dies? ›

    A deceased account is a bank account, such as a savings or checking account, that's owned by a deceased person. A bank will freeze the account when it receives notice that a customer has died while waiting for direction from the authorized court regarding payment to heirs and creditors.

    How do I withdraw money after my dad died? ›

    If the deceased names a payable on death or transfer on death beneficiary for the account, the person named will get access to it immediately. They will simply need to show a death certificate and identification to the bank.

    Can I take money from my parents account after death? ›

    It is illegal to continue to make payments, withdraw money, or use the bank account of an individual who has died without following the correct legal process. To withdraw money from the deceased's account, the administrator will need to obtain letters of administration.

    Why shouldn't you always tell your bank when someone dies? ›

    Amy explains that waiting to inform the bank allows a family member time to gather all relevant information, including details on life insurance policies and electricity and utility bills. After notifying the bank, the account will be frozen, meaning nothing can be taken out or deposited.

    When a family member dies who is financially responsible? ›

    The executor — the person named in a will to carry out what it says after the person's death — is responsible for settling the deceased person's debts. If there's no will, the court may appoint an administrator, personal representative, or universal successor and give them the power to settle the affairs of the estate.

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