Q: Is it OK to not go to the wedding but attend just the reception if you are not of the same religious beliefs as the bride and groom?
A: When people receive an invitation to a wedding and a reception they are being invited to one of the most important events in a couple's lives. The wedding is the reason for the celebration that takes place after the ceremony. It isn't the other way around. You are invited to witness this important event. And to attend just the reception based on differing religious views would be rude, unless an unforeseen reason came up, such as an emergency of some kind. If that is the case, a brief explanation of why you missed the ceremony would be in order.
If you are invited to a wedding ceremony that differs greatly from what you are used to, take the opportunity to learn something about how things are done in that particular religion before you attend. Do a little homework on what will take place during the ceremony and what is expected of the guests. For instance, there may be some expectation for dress when attending certain ceremonies.
If you are the couple being married in a religious ceremony that is very different from what many of your guests are used to, it is nice to offer some explanation of what is taking place during the ceremony in the program. Or see whether your minister or officiant will be offering prompts and explanations during the ceremony as to what guests can participate in and be a part of.
Attending and showing respect doesn't mean you are converting to someone else's faith. It simply says you want to be part of their special day.
— Karen Hickman is an etiquette/protocol consultant and owner of Professional Courtesy in Fort Wayne, Indiana.
