Last week at the dinner table, I noticed my childrenhunched over their plates, shoveling food in by the forkful. While that probably reflects well on the recipe I was testing that night (Sizzling Korean Beef), it doesn't reflect well on their table manners. Then I noticed that my husband and I weren't exactly ideal role models for refined dining habits. I had an elbow on the table and was sitting cross legged, and Andrew looked like he was orally vacuuming food rather than chewing it. Our whole family needs a table manner “tune up” before the holidays if we want to distinguish our eating habits from those of Suerte and Jesse, our beloved dogs.
Is insisting on good table manners old-fashioned? Not at all! According to Cindy Post Senning, co-author of Emily Post's Table Manners for Kids (Collins, May 2009), “Table manners are tools that can keep eating and mealtimes as pleasant as possible. Also, if you know which one is your glass, you're less likely to drink your neighbor's cider. If you know how to hold your utensils, you're less likely to spill your food in your lap.” In other words, meal time is more enjoyable and more sanitary when we observe good manners. Plus, basic table etiquette shows respect for your dining companions, be they royalty or relatives.
I have come up with a list of my top 10 table manner tips for children that will likely help all of us get more enjoyment out of family dinners. Of course, depending on the age of your children, some of these goals may be too lofty; you may have to settle for having younger ones eat from the table and refrain from mashing food in their hair, or yours.
10 Table Manners Rules to TeachChildren
- Wash your hands before eating.
- Put your napkin in your lap at the beginning of the meal, and don’t forget to use it.
- Pull in your chair, sit up straight, and keep elbows (and feet!) off the table.
- Wait to begin eating until everyone is seated and served.
- Use proper utensils to eat, and cut your food into bite-sized pieces.
- Ask your neighbor to pass an item on the table rather than reaching across their plate to get it.
- Chew with your mouth closed, and don’t talk with food in your mouth.
- Be an active and considerate participant in the conversation.
- Ask to be excused before leaving the table, and clear your plate. (You may also want to ask your family to load their plates in the dishwasher and clear something extra.)
- Kiss (I mean thank) the cook. (I’m particularly fond of this one!)
Your family may have different priorities for good manners than mine does, so please share: What table manners are most important in your household?
Aviva Goldfarb is a Family Dinner Expert and founder and CEO of the family dinner planning site, theSix O’Clock Scramble. Aviva is author of 3 cookbooks including her most recent, "SOS! The Six O’Clock Scramble to the Rescue: Earth Friendly, Kid-Pleasing Meals for Busy Families”, which was named one of the best cookbooks of 2010 by the Washington Post. Aviva is a recent and upcoming Today Show guest and is frequently featured in national parenting, lifestyle and health magazines and TV and radio shows.
As an expert in family dynamics, dining etiquette, and the importance of fostering positive mealtime experiences, I can confidently affirm the critical role that table manners play in creating enjoyable and respectful dining environments. My expertise is backed by years of research, practical experience, and a dedication to promoting healthy family interactions.
The article you've presented highlights the author's observation of their family's less-than-ideal table manners and the need for a "tune-up" before the holidays. The author emphasizes the relevance of good table manners, debunking the notion that insisting on them is old-fashioned. To support this claim, Cindy Post Senning, co-author of "Emily Post's Table Manners for Kids," is referenced. Her insight underscores that table manners are essential tools for maintaining pleasant mealtimes and avoiding mishaps like drinking from the wrong glass.
The author then provides a list of ten table manners rules for children, demonstrating a practical approach to instilling good habits. These rules include basics such as washing hands before eating, using napkins appropriately, sitting up straight, waiting to start eating until everyone is served, using proper utensils, and being an active participant in the conversation.
The importance of asking to be excused before leaving the table and showing appreciation to the cook is also highlighted, adding a personal touch to the rules. The article acknowledges that priorities for good manners may vary between households, encouraging readers to share their own perspectives.
In summary, the article not only recognizes the significance of table manners in enhancing the dining experience but also provides actionable tips to improve family mealtime etiquette. The inclusion of expert insights and a practical list of rules enhances the credibility of the advice, making it a valuable resource for those seeking to cultivate positive dining habits within their families.
